One Sure Way to Build the Confidence You Need to Act on What You Want
I've always been tight with my money. I'm a frugal person and not ashamed to admit it. I save, save, and save some more. Not for anything inparticular, more like a rainy day fund. But one day I was reading this post from one of my favorite blogs and it dawned on me that I get nervous to spend money on myself? Why is that? It's my money. I've earned it. Who else should it be spent on?
I've always been tight with my money. I'm a frugal person and not ashamed to admit it. I save, save, and save some more. Not for anything inparticular, more like a rainy day fund. But one day I was reading this post from one of my favorite blogs and it dawned on me that I get nervous to spend money on myself? Why is that? It's my money. I've earned it. Who else should it be spent on?
When it comes to my needs: bills, food, toiletries, shoes, I never think twice. Although, when it comes to things that may not be a necessity, but could be beneficial towards my goals, I hesitate.
Investing in yourself and your business is crucial to your success. Doing otherwise will stunt your growth, delay progress, and give you one more excuse to why you are here⬇ instead of there➡. We spend a lot of money on things that never pay for itself, but clutters our physical and mental space instead.
What if the money you had after paying for your needs (bills, food, shoes) you spent it on pursuing your goals? What if you bought a book, purchased an online course, attended a seminar, or hired a coach?
How would your goals be affected? That book would fuel you with knowledge. That course would provide you with tools and tactics. That seminar would ignite inspiration to push further. That coach would keep you on track and never allow you to waiver. You would be surprised by how much faster and easier your goals come into fruition.
I decided to do the same some time ago. I vowed to stop skimping on the things that mattered a lot to me (specifically my business). I spent the money and did not hesitate. It's funny how quickly things began to evolve. I gained access to information and opportunities that were unexpected. Speaking engagements started coming my way, clients were interested in hiring me, and I started to apply myself like never before.
Taking something as tangible as money and putting it towards something intangible, like dreams and goals, provokes confidence. I could see the vision in my head become more of a reality in my life.
Simply put, I put my money where my mouth is.
When you're presented with an opportunity to purchase something that would feed your dreams, and you hesitate instead of jump, subconsciously you are asking yourself one thing:
Can I really get a better job? Can I run my own business? Can I really do this?
Here's the thing, you can and you will, but only when you act will you find out. In order for others to invest in your talents you must be willing to do it first.
The vision in your mind is worth the money in your pocket. It's worth an opportunity to become reality and it cannot live off faith alone. Turn your dream into a need. Invest in yourself and never hesitate because what you have no one else can give.
Feel Free,
Mel
How to Find Freedom in a Job You Hate
How are you supposed to feel free when every morning you walk into work it feels like you've stepped into a cage? How do you gain peace of mind when your manager is down your throat, and the very thought of work makes you anxious? There are days that your job feels like a punishment.
You ask yourself: How did I end up here?
How are you supposed to feel free when every morning you walk into work it feels like you've stepped into a cage? How do you gain peace of mind when your manager is down your throat, and the very thought of work makes you anxious? There are days that your job feels like a punishment.
You ask yourself: How did I end up here? What did I do to deserve this? How will I make it out of here? Here's the thing,
you cannot look at your job like a punishment.
Just because your position is less than ideal or looks nothing like your dream job, doesn't mean it sucks. There is opportunity within every challenge.
It is possible to find freedom within a job you hate.
1st thing: See your position as a door you must go through to get to the door you really want. Once you open the door, take a look inside and take advantage of all there is to offer. Then is when the next door will appear.
2nd thing: Do something for yourself first. No one is going to care about you and your dreams more than you do. I get this philosophy from my financial practices. Finances 101: Pay Yourself First. No matter the amount of your check, transfer money into your savings before you pay a single bill. You're paying into your future dreams, your future success, your future happiness. If you take care of your needs before anyone else's, you're able to perform a lot better without the feelings of guilt or regret. You can start your day feeling good about accomplishing something real for yourself.
3rd thing: Ask yourself, what opportunity is in front of me that I'm not taking advantage of? How can you get the most out of your job? Does your company offer free certifications or trainings that will add to your skill set? Do they have networking functions where you can expand your business relationships? Can you develop you punctuality, attitude, social demeanor, public speaking, or typing skills?
There is always room for your personal growth wherever you are.
Stop looking at the job as only a paycheck. Stop acting as if the company owes you something for being there each day. Guess what, all they owe you is the amount you agreed to receive every 2 weeks. Nothing more and nothing less, but that doesn't mean you can't gain much more if you're open to it. Remember take advantage of ALL there is to offer, once you do, that next door will appear.
4th thing: Practice making friends. This is the first day of high school all over again. A few faces you may recognize from college or past jobs, but majority of the people are brand spanking new. Just like you, these people don't want to stay here the rest of their careers. This is a stepping stone to their dreams and goals. And when they are ready to open their new door, they will want to take someone along with them. I can't tell you the amount of opportunities I've gained from relationships cultivated in the midst of the moment. I received a paid internship at Emory University that I was no where near qualified for (on paper) from making friends with one of the guests I served while working at a dessert bar. I hardly ever made good money there, but I didn't leave empty handed. On top of the handy baking skills, I left that job with friendships from various backgrounds and an internship I would've never gotten without the recommendation of a guest.
5th thing: Know that you're doing something meaningful for someone else. The garbage man isn't saving world hunger, but he sure is making life a lot better for a lot of people. A job does not have to be filled with soul gushing meaning in order to be important. What you do does matter a whole lot to someone. Don't overlook this. This gives your position purpose. This gives you power. Don't take advantage of it and don't minimize it.
Lastly (This is really the most important): Do Your Best This is more vital than anything else. When you do your personal best you feel proud of yourself. You don't need the accolades or the acknowledgements, because you know you've given all you got. And more than likely this will get noticed. Each day,
have the best day you can have by being your best version of you.
Why does the cage bird sing? Not because she is asked or expected to but because she is free. She is free to be all she was meant to be. No cage can contain her greatness or her bliss. She will relentlessly shine while others stare and wish. Feel Free, Mel
Where are all the Things You Should Have by Now?
How many of you thought you would have a corner office overlooking the city with great big windows by the age of 30? How many were under the impression that a few years after college there would be a big desk with your name on it, a plush leather chair whereyou took calls, cancelled calls, and made enough money for a new car, a home of your own, and plenty of spending cash for trips and clothes?
How many of you thought you would have a corner office overlooking the city with great big windows by the age of 30? How many were under the impression that a few years after college there would be a big desk with your name on it, a plush leather chair where you took calls, cancelled calls, and made enough money for a new car, a home of your own, and plenty of spending cash for trips and clothes?
Sidenote: I honestly don't know who gets big beautiful offices because my manager's manager works in the same tiny office I occasionally pump my breastmilk in. There's no windows, no gold-plated nametag, no big desk, and the chair has to be from Office Max 10 years ago. FACT.
I always envisioned I would've traveled more places by now. I would've definitely had the walk-in closet of my dreams by now. I would absolutely own a nice modern condo downtown by now. Most importantly, I would be running my own business by now.
The place you thought you would be "by now" doesn't exist.
That place was put there to excite you. It was put there to show you what's in store if you better yourself, build your talents, and work hard.
But there's no time stamp on when you will have all that you've ever wanted. And there's no guarantee it will look like what you've imagined.
You must let go of the fantasy double-life you're simultaneously living in your head and check-in to what's real. See all you have done to get here and all you are doing to maintain. What does that look like?
Is it what you imagined? Is it what you hoped for?
I didn't imagine myself with a child until 29...maybe 30. I didn't imagine working for a telecom company because I've never been tech savvy (until now apparently). I never imagined myself skipping out on grad school to pursue a career in coaching.
I never imagined myself here and now that I am, it's not what I thought it would be. The things I hoped for didn't come in the package I expected, but it came.
I'm pursuing a career that is aligned with who I am but I'm doing it as I work at a job I can't stand. The rest of my 20's will be filled with adventures by the side of, not one, but the two loves of my life.
There are still many things that I long for, but I see now that I can have it in many different forms.
Our imagination creates all of our possibilities. We need our imagination to drive us. But don't let the power of your imagination keep you from embracing the things you want just because it's delivered in a different box. What you imagine you can create, you can be, you can have. But sitting in your imagination and refusing to exam your current reality because it's not what you thought it should be is suicidal for your heart's desires.
Everyday it is easy to envision the future, but looking at your life for what it is brings up all the things it's not, as well as what it has become. It allows you to see the things you've done and all the things you have yet to do. You see all the choices that have brought you this far. With a close look, not with your mind but with your heart, you may realize you have exactly what you long for.
This your reality check.
Feel free, Mel